Ten days ago, I turned 30.
It still feels so strange to say that out loud.
A part of me feels like I’m just getting started, and the other feels like I’m already late to everything. Late to marriage and kids. Late to owning a home. Late to success. Late to whatever version of “having it together” I thought I’d have by now.
When I was younger, I had this idea that by 30, everything would fall into place. I’d be working the same corporate job for over 5 years now, I’d own a beautiful house, I’d have published a couple books, and maybe even own one of those thousand-dollar coffee machines like the ones they use at coffee shops.
Fast forward, and life isn’t at all what I imagined it would be at this age. I’m not a published author, I don’t have kids, I don’t own a house, I’m working freelance (and it’s hard A.F.), and, well, I’m still figuring things out.
In my 20s, I made a list of 30 things I wanted to do before I turned 30. I called it my 30 before 30. It wasn’t even a “serious” list. Nothing like “getting married” or “having kids.” Just a bunch of fun stuff, like “going to a pet café,” “trying a new hairstyle,” or “booking a staycation.”
But somewhere between work, life, and everything in between, that list got lost. And when my 30th birthday came around, I looked at it again and realized I hadn’t done any of it.
At first, I felt really disappointed. I felt like it was just “too late now.”
On top of that, some titas began telling me I should “just become a nun,” because I’m “30 and still not married.” Others commented about how “when they were my age, they already had 2 kids.” All that noise, it made me question my life’s timing even more.
But then I thought, why does it matter if the timing looks different? Maybe it was never about finishing everything before 30, or having it all figured out by now. Maybe it’s about trusting the timing of my own life, and growing into these things as I go.
Getting married, buying a house, having kids, and even publishing a book or finally taking that pottery class… I have to trust that these things will happen when they’re meant to, and not force them to fit some societal timeline.
So here’s my 30 at 30.
1. Go to a pet café
I've been afraid of animals for as long as I can remember (but that's a story for another time). I want to finally sit in a cat or dog café, enjoy a latte, and just exist around them without panicking. Baby steps.
2. Book a solo karaoke session
Growing up, I loved singing. I'd grab the Magic Sing karaoke microphone just for fun in the basement, and perform for my family in the living room. I want to reconnect with that part of myself again.
3. Take a dance class
I took dance classes all throughout my childhood: ballet, tap, jazz, hip hop, even Filipino folk dancing. I miss that feeling of moving freely, and having fun through dance. I want to bring a little of that joy back.
4. Take a yoga class
I took a yoga class back in CÉGÈP for gym class, and ended up loving it. I want to get back into it again to slow down, breathe, and reconnect with myself.
5. Send a manuscript
It's always been my biggest dream to publish a book (or 10). It's time I finally put my hidden stories out into the world, and maybe one day see my books displayed on top of Indigo shelves.
6. Use all my stickers (okay, almost all of them)
I have WAY too many stickers (it's a bit of a problem...). I want to be able to let go of my "sticker anxiety," and just have fun creating with them.
7. Start an online cooking or baking show
I love being in the kitchen. It relaxes me! I want to share my love of cooking and baking, even if the camera makes me nervous.
8. Visit a Chinese medicine doctor
I've been dealing with all sorts of health issues since I was a kid, and I've always been curious about Eastern medicine. I want to see what it can do for me (plus how cool would it be to get my tongue analyzed?).
9. See a movie alone
I don't think I've ever been to the movies all by myself. I've only ever gone to the movies with friends or on a date, and I want to finally experience what it's like to watch one just for myself.
10. Take the R.E.M.
Because how have I still never been on it? It'd be fun to finally ride it, and explore the South Shore area.
11. Learn how to (or try to learn how to) ride a bike
I never had a proper bike growing up (just a tiny one with training wheels!) so I never really learned. But hey, better late than never?
12. Learn how to use Adobe Illustrator
I've always loved drawing and doodling, and I want to finally learn how to illustrate digitally (and design my own sticker sheets!).
13. Get new eyeglasses
I've been wanting to refresh my look, and feel a little more confident in my style. It's also a chance to finally give my eyes some extra care and attention.
14. Eat at a fancy restaurant alone
I've eaten alone at fast food restaurants with no problem, but I usually feel awkward sitting by myself at fancier places. I want to finally enjoy a nice meal alone without overthinking it.
15. Stop my nail picking habit
I have the worst nail picking habit, especially when I'm super stressed or anxious. I've been doing better and better, but sometimes I'll still catch myself picking at an uneven nail. I want to finally break the habit completely, and start pampering my nails instead.
16. Have a professional photoshoot
If you're like me, you're always taking nice photos of everyone else, but no one ever takes nice photos of you. I'll pay whatever it takes to get all glammed up, and finally have nice photos taken (maybe I could finally change my profile picture too).
17. Do one unassisted pull-up
I've always admired people who can do a pull-up, and I've never been able to manage one myself. I want to build the strength, and challenge myself.
18. Go on a staycation
I want to spend a weekend exploring my city like a tourist (and eat at all the places I'd never been to before!). Sometimes, you don't need to travel far for adventure!
19. Splurge on something I've been eyeing
Maybe this is the year I finally get that fancy coffee machine I've been dreaming about, or my first designer handbag. I'm learning to treat myself because I deserve it!
20. Write a letter to my future self
I've always loved writing, and I've always loved handwritten cards. I want to write a letter to my future self so I can read it years later, and see how much I've grown and changed.
21. Try pottery or ceramics
I want to get my hands messy and create something with my own two hands. There's something satisfying about shaping clay and seeing a piece slowly take form.
22. Try a cuisine I've never had
I love exploring new flavours! There's something so interesting about eating one's way into a culture they've never experienced before.
23. Try a new hairstyle or hair colour
I'm not the best at stepping out of my comfort zone and embracing change. Experimenting with a fresh look feels like the right challenge!
24. Travel to my first music festival abroad
I recently got into EDM and went to my first local festival, and it was such much fun. Now I want to take it further and experience my first music festival in a different city.
25. Go on a spontaneous (ish) trip
If you know me, I'm a type A, crazy planner through and through, and the idea of exploring somewhere new with no plan in mind feels terrifying. But maybe a little spontaneity could lead to the kind of adventure I didn't know I needed.
26. Spend a full day offline
I spend so much of my day staring at screens, whether it's for work, writing, or just scrolling endlessly. It would feel so refreshing to do a full digital detox (maybe even somewhere quiet like a cabin!), and just be fully present with life again.
27. Sign up for a writing class
I've always loved writing, and I want to get back to the kind of writing that's fun and creative (not just business writing I do for work). Taking a writing class feels like the perfect way to nurture that passion again, and play with words just for the joy of it.
28. Learn how to apply makeup
I've somehow made it to 30 without really knowing how to put on makeup. I want to finally learn, play around a bit, and just have fun with it.
29. Run a marathon (okay, more like a half marathon)
I used to run A LOT, and I miss that feeling of rhythm, focus, and accomplishment that comes with it. I want to challenge myself again. I want to train properly, stay consistent, and cross that finish line one more time!
30. Get back into kickboxing
I used to do kickboxing all the time before COVID hit (not the fighting kind, but the strength, cardio, and self-defence training kind). I miss how empowering and energizing it felt, and I'd love to get back into that routine again.
So if you’re like me and you feel you may not have done everything you thought you would, remember that there are still SO many adventures and little joys ahead, and you get to enjoy them all in your own time.
Here’s to this new decade, embracing it fully, and enjoying every step of the journey.
The Lilac Blog 