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What Your Coffee Order Says About You

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They say you are what you eat, but I say you are also what you drink.

Your go-to coffee order, kind of like your wardrobe or your favourite book, can say a lot about you. I learned that firsthand during my barista days, when I realized lots of orders came with a personality.

So whether you’re the “just a decaf, please” type or the “triple shot, oat milk, half-sweet vanilla latte with extra foam, cinnamon, a drizzle of caramel, and rainbow sprinkles” kind (but also, what the f*ck is wrong with you?!), here’s what your go-to coffee order might say about you.

Americano

You like to get sh*t done.

You’re the type who enjoys colour-coded Excel sheets, and powers through to-do lists like it’s a sport. You start your mornings with a digital planner, and end them scheduling just one last email, which probably explains why you need such a strong dose of caffeine… 👩🏻‍💻

Affogato

You’re a huge sweet tooth.

Let’s be honest: you saw “ice cream” and didn’t need to read the rest. The only coffee you ever touch comes in affogato or tiramisu, and your dream dinner is basically a tray full of pastries. #GirlDinner 💁🏻‍♀️

Cold Brew

You’re kind of a nerd.

You know the exact difference between cold brew and iced coffee, and you know why a cold brew is better (especially a nitro cold brew). You have a fun fact for everything, and it wouldn’t surprise anyone if you graduated with a 4.0. 🤓

Decaf

You’re like 60 or something.

Either you actually are old, or you have an old soul. Either way, you love a good cardigan and a classic episode of Jeopardy. And caffeine is not your friend, because you absolutely need to be in bed by 8:30 PM sharp. 👵🏼

Espresso

You’re a night owl.

You thrive after dark and always need a quick jolt to recover from your late nights spent gaming, binging the latest hot TV series, or out at the bar. One shot and you’re awake, alert, and ready to keep going. 🦉

Oh, and side note: It’s “espresso,” not “expresso.” The only thing an “expresso” says about you is that you don’t know Italian, and you don’t really know coffee… 😐

Freddo Cappuccino

You watch a lot of TikTok.

You spotted this drink trending online and knew you HAD to try it (especially if the foam is pink!). And chances are you’ll post it on Instagram immediately, sitting right next to your pumpkin spice latte, apple crumble macchiato, or whatever the latest trendy seasonal drink is. 😙

Mocha

You don’t even like coffee like that.

You probably just wanted to order a hot chocolate, but needed a little caffeine to get through the day. You’re likely extroverted and outgoing, and, just like your drink, warm and comforting too. 🫂

Vanilla Latte

You love a good routine.

Your mornings start strong with a pilates class, and your not-too-sweet, not-too-bitter vanilla latte is the perfect follow-up. You probably have a specific milk preference too, and it’s probably oat milk. And in the afternoon, you savour it while editing your latest travel vlog in a cute café. 📸

So, what’s your go-to coffee order? And do you think it says a lot about you? Let me know in the comments! ☕️

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